Previously On Lost: Pikmin and Drill Dozers Play with Lego

Jonnie and I finished the Lost game, and he is now going to try desperately to sell it on ebay. All in all, it was a pretty shitty game, but I'm glad I played it. But that's mostly because Jon spent his hard-earned money on it and not me. If I had paid $60 for it, I would definitely feel differently.

Again, I don't wanna spoil anything so I'll keep all of this as vague as possible. Elliot's backstory turned out to be mildly interesting, especially if you're a follower of the mythology covered in supplemental stuff like The Lost Experience. For the most part though, it was really nothing special. The real interesting part of the game, story-wise, was its ending. Again, no spoilers here, but the ending of this game presented a crazy twist the likes of which we've never seen on Lost before. If this could be considered "canon" - in that it's a theme that will also be explored on the TV show - then this ending opens up some very interesting possibilities. If it's NOT canon, then it will probably be directly contradictory to the TV show. I had to find out if this ending was sanctioned by the creator's of the show, or if it's just weird fan-fiction slapped together by some Ubisoft hack. A buddy tipped me off to this interview, which states that Damon Lindelof himself came up with the ending. Interesting.

Anyway, the game is worth playing for die-hard Lost fans. Both for the ending and the decent amount of fun that is to be had by exploring your favorite locales from the show. Just make sure you RENT rather than buy, because the game is only like six hours long, and is mostly dumb bullshit.

So, what else have I been playing? Well, having reached a part I just plain can't figure out in Phoenix Wright, I decided to take a break from it for a while and play my newly-acquired (for $5!!) copy of Drill Dozer. This game is just fucking wonderful. It is Nintendo at its best, combining classic old-school gameplay with a fun and fresh new mechanic. Esentially, every level is a miniature little Metroidvania environment, which your character must explore. The twist is, you are in a giant Drill Dozer, and must drill through various blocks, structures and enemies in order to advance. As you progress through each level, you find additional gears for your drill, which allow you to access previously blocked areas. The whole drill thing may sound like a one-note mechanic, but it's really quite impressive how many interesting platforming ideas they got out of this seemingly-simple action. The fact that you control the drill with the shoulder buttons and that the game has a built-in rumble feature adds to the fresh feeling of drilling shit.

My one complaint about the game is a complaint I have about 90% of platform games: that the developers felt the need to throw in stupid-ass water and flying levels. I fucking hate water levels. They are the worst, most annoying part of any game they're in (including Super Mario and Donkey Kong Country games. They interrupt the flow of the gameplay, and in the case of Drill Dozer, the core gameplay is so fine-tuned and perfect, that it's really a bummer when you have to swim. Or fly. Flying is even worse. I just encountered the game's flying level, which introduces an awkward and annoying new control scheme, and to make matters worse, I suspect that this is the game's final level. Now that's really lame! As annoying as the swimming levels in Mario games are, at least I don't have to swim around fucking Bowser as my last dumb-ass action in an otherwise brilliant game! That would put a little bit of a damper on my Drill Dozer experience. But, like I said, this is just a theory so far. If I can ever BEAT THE FUCKING STUPID FLYING LEVEL, I'll confirm or deny the validity of my hypothesis. Even if it turns out to be true, however, 90% of this game is pure brilliance, and I can't recommend it enough. I really hope Nintendo has the sense to put out a sequel on the DS or dare I say WiiWare.

I also beat Lego Star Wars. What a beautiful game. I am really looking forward to Lego Indiana Jones and Lego Batman. It seems to me like Lego has created one of the most potentially brilliant franchises of all time here. They can keep making sequel after sequel, retaining the same addictive gameplay, but applying an awesome new license to each one. That way they can keep the series fresh and interesting, while at the same time drawing in new legions of fanboys for each game. A cursory glance at the Lego website reveals that the only other current licenses are all pretty lame (Harry Potter, Spongebob Squarepants, Avatar), but I'm sure if these games continue to be successful, the possibilities will be endless. Imagine a Lego Resident Evil?? Holy shit, that would rule.

I've also just rediscovered my Wii's capabilities as a Gamecube, and have begun replaying Pikmin. I loved the shit out of this game when it first came out, but I never beat it. I basically played until success seemed hopeless, and then started again, and repeat. I guess I'm doing it again now. But, so far, I'm doing pretty well. I've been playing for ten in-game days, and I have ten parts of my spaceship reclaimed. Not bad, so far. Unfortunately, I just wrapped up the game's first two locations, which means I have to venture into the stupid horrifying Forest Naval level, with its fire-monsters, maze-like layout and endless creepy beaches. To make matters worse, I just lost all my yellow Pikmin except about 25 in an against-my-better-judgment attempt to take down a big-ass ladybug. I forgot that a couple of them were holding bombs, and then BOOM!! Oh god it was sad. I don't know how I'm going to go on.

But all the dumb shit I just wrote is totally moot compared to the fact that SMASH BROS. BRAWL COMES OUT THIS SUNDAY. I can't fucking wait. Holy shit.

Lost Potential

Last night Jonnie Whoa Oh and I, along with our friend Seth, played the Lost video game on Jonnie's Xbox 360. As a preface, I should mention that all three of us are rabid, obsessive Lost fans, and so we were pretty excited to delve into this game. If you're not a follower of the TV show, then this post is probably going to be pretty irrelevent to you, but if that's the case, you should really be ashamed of yourself, because Lost is the best television show of all fucking time. You best learn your shit. For those of you who DO like the TV show, rest assured that the following post will be spoiler free, because I wouldn't dream of ruining the game's story for you. Well, it'll be mostly spoiler-free. If you can't assume that in the Lost game you'll be encountering the smoke monster and entering the hatch, for example, then fuck you. Choke on my spoilers. Choke on them.

Okay, first I'll tackle the positive aspects of this game, which shouldn't take very long. First of all, bear in mind that this is my first experience with a "next-gen" video game system. So I must say that I was totally fucking blown away by the graphics. The environments in this game are simply gorgeous, lush and drool-worthy. It almost made me depressed, briefly, to be a Wii loyalist. The characters, however, are stuck firmly in the uncanny valley. Not quite as badly as the characters in the CSI game, but still pretty bad. No biggie though, because the environments more than make up for it.

If you are a fan of Lost, this game's entertainment value rises about its mediocrity, because it's pretty exciting to be able to explore the various locations from the show. Walking around on the beach, in the Hatch, and in the black rock is a real treat. The hatch is especially awesome, it's layout precise to the TV show. I knew my way around fairly well from the moment I stepped in, and it was great fun to play with the computer, type in the numbers and look around for stuff I remembered from this location on the show. The game is also divided into"episodes", all of which are preceded by a "previously on Lost" segment, which is really fun. Likewise, it's fun to see how your progress in the game coincides with the going-ons from the first two seasons of the TV show. That kind of fan service makes the game more satisfying than it should be.

The plot of the game is also fairly intriguing. I'm not gonna give too much away, but your character was a passenger on Oceanic 815, and the crash rendered him an amnesiac. He doesn't remember anything about his life, or even his name, and the plot of the game revolved around him slowly remembering the details of his life and of the circumstances that led to him being on 815. These memories are triggered via flashbacks, and will presumably lead to a story that is tied in with the Lost mythology. More on these flashbacks later.

The most hilariously awful aspect of this game is the voice-acting. Some characters from the show (Desmond, Claire) actually provided their own voices, and a couple of others are represented by fairly decent sound-alikes (Kate, Jack). But the majority of characters' voice actors are ridiculously awful. Locke and Sawyer (who sound like Barney Rubble and Yosemite Sam, respectively) are especially bad. It's pretty weird to me that these guys couldn't take two hours out of their lives to record some dialogue for this game, but whatever.

The most depressing thing about this game is that there is SO much potential that is just totally wasted. For example, I don't know about you, but the first thing I think of when I imagine a Lost video game is getting to run around and explore the jungle. Unfortunately, you are unable to do this. The jungle in this game pretty much just acts as a catalyst to get between settings you actually CAN explore. Entering the jungle triggers a shift to a new gameplay mode, where the player is on a rigidly linear path and must follow signposts or compass bearings from one checkpoint to the next, until he reaches his final destination. If you stray even a little bit from this set path, the game stops you in your tracks, your character says "I've lost my bearings" and you are placed back at the beginning of your path. This is super, super fucking lame - especially since the jungle is SO fucking beautiful and lush and lifelike. As I walk through it, all I want to do is break away from the linear path and explore, but it's just not allowed. I don't really see why this game couldn't act like other action games, where you are given a map of your environment and you are free to explore as you make your way to your destination. It's really a shame.

The second huge piece of wasted potential is the aforementioned flashback segments of the game. Basically, when you see or hear something that triggers a vague memory, your character enters a flashback. Your goal in these flashbacks is to reclaim a lost memory, which will then somehow aid you on the island. This is a really cool gameplay idea for ANY game, and is especially appropriate for a game based on Lost. Unfortunately, it's fucking lame. First of all, your to-do list within the flashbacks is exactly the same every single time. You have to take a picture of something really obvious, then you have to search for the area's three "clues" (which take the form of a folder, a letter, or a tape recorder every time), and finally, you talk to a character. It would be great if the path to finding your memory was different every time and required some out-of-the-box thinking, like in a great adventure game. Another disappointing thing about these flashbacks is the way your memory impacts your progress on the island. I was hoping it'd be cool stuff like "Oh! I remembered I am an expert rock climber, so now I have a brand new ability within the game!" But no, it always just impacts the conversation paths you are able to have with other characters. The flashback segments are a great idea that could have created some truly unique new gameplay mechanics, ruined by the same type of phone-it-in laziness that diseases nearly all licensed games.

A couple more really shitty things about this game before I wrap this up. First of all, the cave segments. Fuck the god damned cave segments. These involve you making your way through a cave, as your torch slowly burns down, getting hopelessly lost, and eventually falling into a fucking hole or getting attacked by bats. These segments are boring, confusing, and an obvious attempt to add another artificial barrier to this game. The other shitty thing is the puzzles. Or should I say puzzle, because you have to do the same damn "Get the fuse box to the proper wattage through the magic of SUBTRACTION" puzzle about every half hour. Fucking lame city.

I want to end on a positive note, because I really don't HATE this game. The last segment we played before we called it a night involved entering the Dark Territories to reach the Black Rock. This was pretty much just like all the other jungle segments, but with one twist: This time, you were being mercilessly pursued by the smoke monster. To elude him, you have to hide in these little groves of trees, inside of which your POV shifts to first-person. Then you search around, looking and listening for the monster, until you feel the coast is clear. This segment was truly tense and really scary, in a survival-horror kind of way. The monster swirling around your tiny safehold, and its loud-ass noises, made this part of the game full of tension and, for me, immensely satisfying. It's also one of the only parts of the game (besides the hatch) that really, truly makes you feel as if you are inside of the TV show Lost and experiencing what its characters experience. But, I can't help but feel that even this would be massively improved if you had free reign to run around in the jungle, with the monster on your tail.

All in all, I'm enjoying playing the game, but that's really just because of how big a Lost fan I am. If you love the show, definitely rent this game and try it out. We are about halfway through the game, so hey - for all I know, it could get way better. We're gonna probably play again on Sunday, so I'll report back then.